Setting a Goal Weight

I am sure you've realized by now that I like setting goals for myself. I'm not sure why, since I don't always reach them, but I enjoy having something to work towards. In order to make progress then I need to have an end result in mind. In this case it would be a goal weight to end up at instead of just bouncing back and forth between the same few pounds repeatedly.

It hit me recently that I am up close to twenty pounds from my wedding a year and a half ago. I could dwell on that fact, or look at the other side and realize that at one point since the wedding I was up over thirty pounds.

At least there's that fact that I have lost some weight..

I don't want to sit here and think about how far I've come from October 2012. I don't want to think about how I still didn't like my body at that lower weight or the negative thoughts I've said to myself or out loud in the time it took me to gain that much weight. I don't want to think about what my husband must think. I don't want to think of what impression I've put on my child with the things I have said in front of her about my body and my weight. I don't want to think about the struggle it's been to lose the fifteen or so pounds I've lost already.

I don want to think about the rest of this journey, no matter how far or how long it takes. To be honest, I'm not quite sure what my end weight goal is going to be for a few reasons:

1. I want to be at a weight that is a healthy weight for my height. I was recently measured at 5'8" (although I've always been 5'9" so I may need to re-measure) and an ideal weight range for that height is anywhere from 121.7 - 164.4 pounds.
2. I'm in full force training mode, so the weight isn't going to come off as easy when I'm dedicated to running and strength training, plus I'm still trying to find that exercise/food balance.
3. I know that weight I would like to be ideally, but I don't think it's a realistic weight to try to maintain, especially since I haven't seen that weight in close to 5 years so it's not going to be as easy to get or keep the weight off.
4. I want to be less concerned with a number and more concerned with what I'm eating, how I feel and how my clothes fit.

I truly believe that staying near the high end of a healthy weight range would be easier for me in the long run and at this point in my life I just want to be healthy and not worry about vanity pounds.

So that's what I'm aiming for. I would like to get down to and maintain at 160.

But, in order to do that it means that I need a fresh start. I need to make a clean attempt so that I can stop thinking about the past and what I have or have not done. The successes I've seen and the failures along the way. It's all a part of the process and I anticipate it on this journey as well, but I'm going to be starting and giving it my absolute best attempt tomorrow.